It seems pretty obvious to have a blog post about why counseling can be helpful on a counselor’s website. But sometimes the most obvious things are most often overlooked and so I wanted to slow down a bit and take a minute and talk about this. We live in a culture today where busyness is prized and intentional self-care is seen as selfish, or at the best, not the noblest use of our time. Self-care can happen in a lot of ways-many we have heard about for years: exercise, eating good, getting good sleep. When is the last time you have seen “counseling” on a list of suggestions for self-care? I can't think of a time either. We go about our lives thinking, “I mean, I’m fine.” People ask us how we are, and we respond, “I’m fine.” We have this internal dialogue of all the reasons we are “fine”…or should be ”fine”…but…there is something lacking. Something missing. We have good, fulfilling-enough lives filled with careers we tolerate well enough, family that gets along well enough (at least others think so), we are healthy enough, have relatively enough stuff…and yet, it just does not seem like enough. And not in the materialistic sense of the word. As in “there has got to be something more to me…to this life…to my marriage…to raising kids…to my career” sort of enough. The longing, the knowledge of something more that is planted inside of us that will not be silenced, no matter how much we have told it to hush and be fine with “fine.” Counseling is the roadmap to more. Even if you are “fine,” these are some reasons to consider counseling, because, afterall, we are meant for more than “fine”:
Nothing is private anymore. I am not taking a position on social media and whether it is good or bad, but I am simply stating a fact-there is little that is personal or private anymore. AND YET, research tells us that people feel more isolated and alone than ever. Why? Because a lot of people know a lot of THINGS about us, but few i people actually know US. Counseling can bring an authentic and genuine relationship to our lives that results in us being fully known and fully accepted. Counseling provides a place and the relationship that is deeply personal, yet objective and highly confidential so that you can talk about things that you do not post on social media. Just because nothing seems private anymore does not mean that we do not have things are very private and personal that we need a safe place to talk about those things and their impact in our lives.
There is no “wrong” reason to go to counseling and it’s up to you the amount of time and money you invest. But ultimately, if we will not first invest in ourselves, how do we invest in the lives of others? There is better than “fine” and I hope you do everything you can to find it. If any of this resonates with you, please contact me or any number of great therapists in the area.